When we are unable to move forward usually, it's because we cannot decide what to do.
It requires energy to remain unsure all the time. The mind/body connection is real! It's no wonder that we feel exhausted. The instability keeps us up at night. We are stuck in procrastination. We are afraid to say "yes".
The root word of DECIDE is the Latin word desidere. DE=Off. Caedere= to cut. When we decide, we are 'cutting off' all other options and that becomes scary.
What makes it scary?
Are we making the correct choice?
Will I fail?
The tyranny of choice or paradox of choice is when there are many options to choose from and you cannot have them all or do them all. We worry about failure and regret.
Studies have revealed two kinds of regret:
Regret of Omission: When you want to do something and don't. You regret having not done it.
Regret of Commission: When you do something and regret having made that choice.
Research shows that when you want to do something and do not do it (Regret of Omission) the pain of that kind of regret may not be very strong at first but, it lasts the longest because of the "what if's". You never give yourself the opportunity to fulfill the potential of your idea.
On the contrary, when you move forward with a decision and regret it (Regret of Commission), you feel more pain at first but the regret is shorter. Some mistakes can be reversed, apologized for and for those that cannot, we can reframe them as learning experiences. We give ourselves the opportunity to fulfill the potential of our idea and we know that at least we tried.
We are capable of making great decisions! Just knowing about the different kinds of regret can help remove some the fear of committing to a decision. Regret is a human emotion that is part of life because we have to make choices. Some are easy and some are not. The hard ones require review by writing them down or speaking to a trusted person about the pros and cons that line-up with your values and consciousness that we are interconnected.
Be happier by making a decision and commit to it! Once you have, take it one day at a time, give yourself permission to be human and know that we all need a growth curve. You are more capable than you think!